We are living in a challenging time when one income is not enough, and sometimes as husbands and fathers we must work multiple jobs to provide for our family. Maybe we are in a situation where we only see our children every other weekend. What we do not realize is that while we are working long hours and traveling for days and weeks on end we are creating vulnerabilities in our families. We are communicating to our children that the ability to buy them things is more important than spending time with them. Our families have lost a great man and leader, we have lost fathers.
I have been there, working multiple jobs because finances were tight. At that time all my daughter wanted was time with me. At that point she did not care about all the toys in the world. Her one question to me was, “Do you have to go to work now?” That was a loud indicator to me that she needed me more than she needed things. So I made the hard decision. We cut corners, didn’t have an entertainment budget for quite some time and found ways to do things together that did not cost much. But now I am reaping the rewards of that decision.
Additionally, we cannot expect our teachers and school systems to teach our children what they need to know. Our schools cannot teach our children Godly values and morals. They cannot teach right from wrong, this is all situational and conditional in their eyes. If you think I am wrong about fathers teaching their children, I encourage you to look through the book of Proverbs and see how many times Solomon said to his son, “My son, hear my words, follow my instruction.” Much of what needs to be learned is learned while spending time with Dad. A young girl starts forming her opinions about men, relationships and sexuality by looking at her father. A young boy begins to learn how to be a man, behave in relationships and act with integrity by watching his dad. Their father is the first example of Jesus Christ that children will see. If a child has a hard time relating to God as a good and loving father, I would challenge you to look at their relationship with their natural father. As men, we clearly do not understand the impact we have in our children’s life. It hurts my heart so to see a child that does not know their father or feel like their father does not care enough to come around. Because of this, they feel they must have done something wrong, they must have failed in some way. On the contrary fathers!! If that is how a child feels, we fathers have failed our children.
5 Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord.
6 And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers,
lest I come and strike the earth with a curse.
Fathers and men, do you not think it is time to turn your hearts back to your children. What good will your job do? What good is your golf handicap? What good is your poker prowess when your children are in prison for a crime or in a hospital for trying to hurt themselves? Men, if you do not have children and you have a niece or nephew or even know a child without a Godly male role model. Isn’t it time to start turning our hearts back to our children and leading them properly? Our children are facing more issues than they will ever communicate to most of us and if we do not nurture these relationship, they are going it alone. We are essentially sending them into battle with no training and no protection. We as good and Godly fathers and men are to be the ones that continue to watch over them, praying for them, believing in them and encouraging and loving them.
Let’s get back to being the fathers that God has called us to be. Leading with tenderness and love. Not causing our children to wrath or be embittered by our actions and words. Teaching them the lessons they need by being the Christ like examples of love, mercy, integrity and the list goes on..
Who is committed to do this? Who will be the ones to stand up for the children that need help and love? Our society has issues and as men, it is our responsibility to have our families in good order. You may not have asked for the job of leader, but God ordained it and it is so. As the man goes, so goes the family. Let’s plan to make our families a success this year and see what will happen in our families, communities and our world.
1 Corinthians 16:14 – Let everything you do be done in love! There is already too much hate and anger in the world. Let’s counter act it with God’s love.